How to look like you’re working hard when you are really really not:


1. Make extensive lists. Your to-do list should include not only your important academic tasks but also any other tasks you might actually complete. As you complete a task, cross it off. As a result, the list will convey your productivity, and may also boost morale.

Example: brush teeth, finish coursework, go to the gym, catch up with lectures, make lunch, eat lunch, watch 30 rock, sunbathe

2. Appear to be organised and tidy. An example of a way to do this may be to put up the lists made in step 1 for those around you to see. Whilst this will help you fool others, it will also provide you with more procrastination activities.

3. Look focused on your work (or Facebook homepage,) by frowning intensely and occasionally typing several phases extremely fast.

4. Comment on or criticise others around you who are procrastinating almost as well as you are. Whilst hugely hypocritical, this step is extremely convincing. The downside is your peers may be more motivated to work thanks to you, whilst you continue to do nothing.

Example: ‘Gertrude why have you not done any more work?! Isn’t your coursework due next week?! You should really be working harder… Like me.’ *shakes head*

5. Start a blog or find another hobby which can provide a good decoy for step 3.


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